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Separating Mothers from State Sponsored Holidays for Profit

5/8/2016

2 Comments

 
Picture
Mrs. Louise Little, the mother of El Hajj Malik El Shabazz (Malcolm X). State sponsored terrorists killed her husband and state institutions drove her to the brink of insanity simply for attempting to raise her children with dignity
My mother died in December of 2009.  She was an extremely complicated woman who grew up under strict Jim Crow segregation in 1930s/40s Louisiana.  She did her very best for me all the time and I love her deeply for that and I dream of her often.  I also have a great deal of respect for all the wonderful mothers that I have come to know over the years.  They are African women, European (White), Indigenous, Asian.  All of them are strong, dedicated, and committed to sacrificing for their children.  Many of them have been doing it alone with no help.  In fact, many of them actually perform the roles of mother and father.  I honor the mother of my daughter.  We have been divorced for 22 years, yet I have as much respect for her as I do anyone else on the planet.  We consciously decided to raise our daughter together and we have done that.  And, although my daughter is 29 now, we continue to support her and play active roles in her life, together.  We moved her across country together last year and we will continue to support her.  There are many, many mothers like her.  I know, see, and interact with them everyday.  One single mom very close in my life tells the story of how she had to be extremely creative in raising her daughter in an extremely low income environment.  She would "liberate" items from capitalist stores and then return them to use the money to buy gifts for her daughter on birthdays, etc.  A dysfunctional thinking person might see that one way, but I see it as a story about love.

These women I'm describing are so incredible that I hardly need state capitalism to dictate to me how and when I should honor them.  I don't need corporations establishing an annual day to recognize amazing women because the state isn't the least bit interested in women in general and mothers in particular.  If the state was interested in women, it wouldn't systematically reduce them to being the property of men.  It would prioritize education around respecting women and it would have policies and practices that reinforced that.  Of course, the only reason the state is sponsoring "Mother's Day" every year is obviously because it wants you to spend money with its institutions.  For capitalism, Mother's day is all about buying flowers, candy, jewelry, etc.  Taking the family out to eat.  Even the church systems get into it by viewing Mother's Day as one of its big collection days of the year.  None of this actually honors mothers.  Instead, it disrespects their contributions because it makes the day as much about material manifestations as it is about honoring the women who hold up this society.

I'm not a hypocrite about this.  I believe the same thing about Father's Day and I have always raised my daughter to view it the same way.  She demonstrates regularly to me that she loves, respects, and appreciates, my involvement and contributions to her life.  She and I don't need a day imposed by the very system we want to see destroyed to underscore our relationship to one another.  So, I suggest here that we think about these false "institutions" that are imposed upon us and the superficial realm from which days like today trivialize what should be a consistently respected phenomenon.  Don't just call your mother today.  Call her tomorrow, Tuesday, next Saturday, and all the time.  Develop real and meaningful relationships based on healthy values of human dignity.  Resist the urge to force a so-called holiday of spending when you have such a poor relationship with one another that you cannot stand to talk to each other for more than 10 minutes.  If we truly want to honor mothers, then we would work on that part of our relationships.  And, we wouldn't stop there.  We would work on confronting this system that is the cause of the struggles women, including mothers, experience everyday.  Holidays in this capitalist system are about maintaining the values of profit over people.  All of them are designed to do that.  We cannot honor each other under that corrupt banner.  We can only do it by stepping outside of it and establishing institutions that honor our mothers, fathers, each other, and all of humanity.  And that requires new values and new work designed to challenge the status quo values that perpetuate the confusion that dominates our lives today.  So, let's pledge to honor our mothers not by staging some fake honor one day a year, but by working to build healthy and constructive relationships with mothers all the time.  You cannot really honor any humans in this society while also honoring this society because capitalism is anti-human.  This is the core contradiction that explains why there is this pressure to "perform" for these "holidays" while the relationship itself is wrought with struggle, contradiction, and dysfunction.  Shouldn't we be talking about all of this instead of acting on days like today that these contradictions don't exist?  That for today, we are going to rise up above this confusion as if we thought of Mother's Day ourselves and it is not a part of this contraction?  If anything, use today to reach out and have a real conversation.  

So, for all you real mothers, you know who you are and you are honored.  Anytime you need my support, you know you have it.  That's true for May, July, September, January, etc.  That's all the time.  I hope you enjoy this day because I hope you enjoy as many days as you possibly can.  You deserve it.  This isn't about taking anything away from you.  You deserve much more than you get.  This post  is about re-framing the system's pimping of our lives because I know that the more we challenge that, the closer we will get to establishing a reality that provides you greater honor than you have ever imagined up to this point.  When we do that, we won't need a designated Mother's Day because everyday will reflect true values of love, honor, and respect for our hardworking mothers.

2 Comments
Carole Moore
5/8/2016 07:57:01 pm

Amen!

Reply
Jeff Pullman
5/21/2016 11:26:45 am

Reply



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    I don't see disagreement as a negative because I understand that Frederick Douglass was correct when he said "there is no progress without struggle."  Our brains are muscles.  Just like any other muscle in our body if we don't stress it and push it, the brain will not improve.  Or, as a bumper sticker I saw once put it, "If you can't change your mind, how do you know it's there?"

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