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Consent:  Adults are Confused, but the Youth Know Boundaries

11/6/2016

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The All African People's Revolutionary Party (A-APRP) chapter in Portland, Oregon runs a weekend freedom school called the School of African Roots (SOAR).  Honestly, we are still in the process of getting better organized so consequently, we are just getting to the point where we can really do community outreach for the freedom school.  Still, the African community here recognizes the need for this school so much that just based on word of mouth, we are getting youth and parents every session.  We are taking great pains to insure the youth receive a quality educational experience because we want them to view education as positive.  And, we believe the pathway to making this happen is in the youth being respected, listened to, and given the positive attention that they deserve contrary to the criminalizing that they often receive in the public schools.  Now, as we've said many times, we are not against the hard working teachers of the public school system.  Most of them are sincere, hardworking, and extremely overworked.  Our issue with starting the freedom school isn't against them.  Its against the system they are forced to work for that has a mission of miss-educating children as a strategy of making them grow into the same mindless robots for the capitalist system that most of their parents are.  Go to work - everyday- work, work, work, don't complain.  Just be happy you have a job.  Accept and appreciate massive exploitation.  Say nothing about people being mistreated and disrespected, including yourself.  And, if you do it right, you can have a house, a couple of cars, and maybe even take a vacation every year.  You will need to drink, get high, be abusive, and suffer other forms of anxiety and depression to handle the assault against your humanity, but hey, at least you have things.  More things than the people exploited in other countries.  And, that's what makes this place great, or maybe potentially great again right?

This is all the dysfunctional nonsense that SOAR seeks to inspire our youth to move beyond so that they can become better people than we are.  So, the most recent session had a focus on consent.  We don't believe that any age is too young to talk about this intense subject.  We believe that any age child can understand the concept that their body is where they live and consequently, their body belongs to them and no one has a say in how their body should be touched, treated, and interacted with except them.  The interesting thing in having the discussion with the youth is they had no problem understanding this concept and they often expressed initiative in agreeing wholeheartedly with the principles based within it.  As I left that session, I was inspired by their clarity, but then I had to think about why it is that grown @ss people seemingly have a much harder time than these youth understanding basic issues like boundaries, respect, and not violating other people's living spaces, their bodies. 

So, since many of you so-called adults, especially menfolk, seem to have a much harder time understanding basic healthy behavior than young children, I'm hoping I can help by laying out some basic rules of everyday conduct that even your small brains should be able to understand:

First, NEVER engage in unsolicited sexual advances towards anyone without their consent.  That means, if they haven't told you that they want to hear your views of what you wish could happen between the two of you, then don't offer your opinion on this issue.  By consent, I mean use your basic social skills that you learned when you were 10 years old like our students.  "Hi!  I would love the opportunity to talk to you more and get to know you better!"  If the person doesn't respond positively to that introduction, that means they aren't interested!  Move on!  Any further efforts you make after that to interact with that person is abuse.

Second, if you do make an offer towards someone, any type of personal offer, and they decline, that means NO and the same principle as above applies e.g. STOP engaging with them that way.

Third, NEVER touch anyone without their consent.  Even when you extend your hand for a shake, that's an attempt to gain their consent.  If they don't extend their hand to you, that's their right.  Respect it!  STOP! 

In other words dudes, any physical interaction that isn't provided consent is abuse and could easily be sexual assault.  Now, I think some of you can benefit from some education and clarification.  I think others of you have some very sick and dysfunctional elements of your emotional state that need immediate attention, but you are not my primary concern.  My concern is creating and implementing a vision of community defense and education that prepares our community to make a demand against your behaviors e.g. either change and/or get help, or be dealt with.  Your behaviors against the community cannot and will not be tolerated.  We cannot live in a world where children exhibit better morality than adult men.  So, if you are still even a little confused, let me make it clear that abusive behavior is always unacceptable.  And for those of you who call yourselves activists for justice who perpetuate abusive behaviors in our communities, don't think we don't and/or won't be able to see through your front of being a principled activist while you try to secretly abuse people when you think no one is looking.  We are doing our work.  As we grow stronger with that work, you will be exposed.  And, you will be held accountable. 

Many of us are tired of having to spend 60% of our time dealing with inappropriate behavior instead of being able to devote our energies towards building capacity to fight the enemies of humanity - capitalism, imperialism and its tools of oppression the prison industrial complex, the military industrial complex, class, race, gender oppression and homophobia, along with the continued exploitation of most of the world's people and resources.  So, our ask for you who are engaging in this behavior is if you need help with issues, have some courage and be honest enough to step forward.  We won't judge you for that.  In fact, we will help you, but if you continue to act revolutionary and progressive in the daytime while engaging in oppressive abuse at night, we will expose you and hold you accountable.  The youth are shedding the light.  Its time.



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    I don't see disagreement as a negative because I understand that Frederick Douglass was correct when he said "there is no progress without struggle."  Our brains are muscles.  Just like any other muscle in our body if we don't stress it and push it, the brain will not improve.  Or, as a bumper sticker I saw once put it, "If you can't change your mind, how do you know it's there?"

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