I think this question was probably most logically answered by El Hajj Malik El Shabazz (Malcolm X) shortly before he was assassinated. When asked to comment on his view of interracial relationships after his break from the Nation of Islam, Malcolm responded that the issue is really one of two people falling in love with one another, regardless of their "racial" background. I agree 100% with Malcolm's analysis, but with that being said, it's important to also acknowledge that whether you want to accept it or not, the concept of race as a social construct is real and something you will have to deal with if you enter one of those types of relationships. Especially if the person of color has knowledge of their history and doesn't compromise who they are as an African, Latino, Asian, etc. If they are that type of proud person, then I guarantee you the issue will come up because history, current events, social norms, attitudes, and values are all taught and respected in this society strictly from the European/Judeo/Christian perspective of the political and economic elite. This ideology is dominant in the school system, the work place, the church, and every institution in this society. As a result, most White people accept this as gospel. Many people of color do too, but there are a significant number of us who challenge that concept on a daily basis. When we do, in the classic realm of blaming the victim, we are accused of being antagonistic, difficult, negative, and everything to suggest the problem is us and not this system. If you are White in an interracial relationship, and you truly believe the relationship should be equally respectful, then that means you must be willing to challenge White supremacy. Unfortunately, most White people aren't willing to do that because they benefit from it. Consequently, many of these relationships are doomed because the person of color feels marginalized and the White person feels attacked. This isn't to discourage anyone. Love who you love, but recognize the contradictions and challenge them. If you do that, your relationship can work, but if you try to believe this is some sort of colorless society (and you lie to yourself and claim you don't see race), unless your partner is an oreo, banana, apple, etc., there's going to be drama. We are all imbued with the ideology I mentioned and in many ways, our choice to be in relationshps is shaped, at least partially, by the negative stereotypes that construct "race" in this country. You have to be aware and accept all of this, not pretend it doesn't exist. Do this and respect each other and work through and communicate the issues, and things can work. Good luck to those who journey down that path!
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